First Father's Day

June 17, 2018 • 1 Comment

“If Father’s willing, he might take care of Baby while you’re busy fixing dinner or doing some of the household chores. With a bit of instruction, any father can give Baby a bottle, or a bath, or learn to change a diaper. Don’t be surprised if he objects to changing when there’s a stool in the diaper. His technique in changing and feeding may be unique but Baby’s basic needs have been met.” - Better Homes and Gardens Baby Book, 1966 (pp. 63-64). Ha!

We’ve had so much fun looking through the baby care instructions in this old “Better Homes and Gardens” book from the 1960s that Neil’s mom passed on to us. Obviously, a lot of advice has changed over the last fifty years, but one of the updates that I’m most grateful for is the recognition of the vital role of fathers. How lucky for babies (and mothers!) that so many fathers today play such an active and important role in the earliest days of their lives. And no baby and mom are as lucky and B and me!!! Neil’s technique is certainly “unique,” but not in the way that Better Homes and Gardens predicted.

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Even before Bennet was born, Neil was attending baby care classes (acing the swaddle), leading our shopping adventures (after I tried to walk out of the store, overwhelmed by the sheer amount of gear), and talking to her everyday (as close to the belly as possible).

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Neil has been on paternity leave for four, glorious weeks. He cuddled, fed, burped, bathed, sang to, changed (especially when there’s a stool in the diaper), soothed, played with, walked, bounced, and swaddled little B around the clock - and not just while I’m “fixing dinner” or “doing some of the household chores.” :) He also does the graveyard shift every night: taking care of B during the wee hours of the morning so I can get some sleep. I can’t think of a better way for him to show us how much he loves us.

I always knew that Neil would be an amazing dad - I just didn’t realize that it would happen so quickly and instinctively. Neil has that perfect combination of strength and warmth that will make Bennet feel safe, full of joy, and adored forever. I already know that feeling. Happy first Father’s Day, Neil!

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Of course, there are two other very special men that we are thinking about today. Shortly after Bennet was born, my dad looked at me and said, “Now, you will finally understand how much I love you.” How lucky Neil and I have been to each feel that profound, endless, awesome love from each of our dads for our entire lives… and now we get to watch that love overflow as these guys become Grandpa and Papa. Lucky B!

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Comments

Gram(non-registered)

Lindsay, what a stunningly beautiful tribute you have written for Neil. Reading it has me welling up with tears, as I am sure Neil will every time he reads it for decades to come. I know this sounds like a Mom bragging, but you two have made the best team with Bennet that I have ever seen or that I could possibly imagine. Every step of the way you have taken this on together with an "We've got this" attitude. Kudos and much love to all of you. XOXOXO

P.S. I have to add that looking at the picture of Bennet while Neil is changing her diaper makes me think that Bennet is saying "I know Dad, I can't look either!"

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